Hidden Love and Revealed Dreams ch1
by LaviBrown
Summary: Hermione is in love...but with who?
1. Hidden Love and Revealed Dreams

Hermione walked into the great hall, she had a sense of foreboding and excitement. Yes, this was a new year, a year that will bring change and growth. Hermione walked in with her head held high, she was going to make this year all she wanted it to be and worrying over taking chances will be little to none.  
  
Hermione eagerly looked around to see if she could find her fellow Gryffindor friends. Not seeing Harry or Ron, Hermione quickly took a seat at the end of the table. She couldn't help think that the sun rise this morning reflected her new beginning. Her summer had been fun and slightly intense. Her new feelings had been giving her a rather hard time. She just wasn't sure how she should approach her blooming love. Hermione had never been in a real relationship before not counting her brief courtship with Viktor Krum for some reason she can only feel inadequate in the relationship department. But she knew for certain that she was madly and deeply in love with..  
  
"Hermione, are you ok?" asked Ginny as she waved her hand in front of Hermione's face.  
  
Hermione snapped out of her daydream thoughts and smiled up at Ginny. "Of course why wouldn't I be?" Hermione said with a tilt of her head. "Can you believe it's a brand new year, there is so many possibilities don't you think."  
  
"Yea I know what you mean. I feel like it was just yesterday when I was a scared little first year in front of the sorting hat. Hermione, can I tell you a secret?" inquired Ginny.  
  
"Anytime you know its safe with me, so do tell Gin" said Hermione with a sudden heightened interest.  
  
Ginny let out a deep breath and looked around to make sure no one else was listening. "I have a crush on Seamus." Hermione watched as Ginny turned a deep shade of red as she let out her love confession.  
  
"Hermione, you must have a crush on some too or a secret romance. You know you can tell me." Ginny raised her eyebrow and leaned in to hear who she likes.  
  
Hermione started to feel her face burn and her stomach flutter. She knew she could tell Ginny and feel complete relief from having held in her secret love for so long, but as Hermione started to open her mouth, Ron and Harry plop down at the table beside her. Hermione was relieved and upset at the same time. Perfect timing I suppose, thought Hermione. Her palms started to sweat as she felt his warmth beside him. Hermione let out an audible sigh.  
  
"Are you alright, Hermione?" Harry asked.  
  
"Um, yes, never been better" Hermione could feel her face burn again and tried to look away. Ron and Harry started talking about some Quidditch player and Ginny started talking to Lavender. Hermione took this time to relish the feeling of sitting next to the man she loves. She could smell his soap and wanted to lean in and run her hands through his hair. Hermione wanted to confess her love and let him know how much he needs her. She wanted to brush her lips gently and sweetly across his and show him how much she loves him. She wanted look into his eyes and read his thoughts. Hermione was so deep in thought that she didn't hear Ron talking to her.  
  
Hermione tried to make herself focus on what he was saying. "What did you say Ron," she said with a slight shake of her head.  
  
"Hermione its time for Potions, we need to hurry or we'll be late." With that the school year began. What Hermione didn't know was that this was going to be the worst and best year of her life. 


	2. Revealed Love and Tragic Beginnings

Days turned into weeks and weeks turned to months. Hermione tried to completely in gross herself in school and doing every extra credit assignment she could. The less she had to think about him the better. Her love had only increased since school started. She looked at him and saw passion, beauty, and everything she had ever looked for in someone to love. Granted she knew he wasn't perfect, but she even loved his imperfections.  
  
Hermione just sat there and stared at her food. She just wasn't hungry anymore. She felt completely miserable. Why did she feel this way? She just couldn't figure it out. Every time he came near it felt like a new day or an exciting adventure. Without him, she just felt empty. Ginny had started to notice the black circles under Hermione's eyes and they way she never ate but just picked at her food. Ginny thought that it was just the stress of school but by now it had gotten out of hand and she knew she needed to have a nice long discussion with Hermione.  
  
As they were leaving the Great Hall, Ginny smoothly guided Hermione to a corner where they could talk privately. "Hermione, I want to know what's going on with you. You haven't been eating, you look like you haven't slept in days and you're always doing something for school you never have fun anymore." Ginny didn't want to hurt her friend's feelings but she needed to get to the bottom of this.  
  
Hermione let out a sigh and just stared at Ginny. She knew she had held on to her secret long enough and she needed to tell someone before she went utterly mad. "Is it that obvious? Ginny, I just don't feel like myself anymore. I just can't seem to figure out the confusion running through my head."  
  
Ginny sat there for an hour listening to Hermione spill out her heart and tried to take it all in. It was strange for Ginny because she ironically knew how Hermione felt and she knew how much it hurt to love someone and not be able to share it with them. Hermione was sobbing at this point and had to stop so that she could catch her breath. Ginny reached over and sympathetically squeezed her hand.  
  
"Hermione, why don't you just tell him? I know he'll understand. He's one of your best friends and I know you can trust him with all these feelings you're having. He might even return them." Ginny looked at Hermione as she said this and saw the extent of her emotional damage through her eyes.  
  
"You know I can't do that. Harry, Ron, and I would never be the same. It will tear us all apart and I don't want to have to choose between them. I can't.." Hermione couldn't finish because she was crying to hard. Ginny reached over and hugged her tight.  
  
"Its ok Hermione I'm here for you now." Ginny wasn't quite sure what to do, but she knew one thing for sure; she needed to help Hermione figure out a way to tell him.  
  
Hermione was so thankful for Ginny. Without her Hermione was sure she would be in even worse shape. Hermione did however manage to put up an excellent front in front of Harry and Ron. She didn't want to scare him off and so she tried to act as normal as possible. Even though when he hugged her she felt like electricity was shooting up her spine or when he looked at her the other day in Potions and gave her that irresistible grin, she almost told him then and there. Her secret was a gift but most of all it was turning into a burden that she can't control anymore.  
  
_______________________________________________________________________  
  
As Hermione sat picking at her food she was pleasantly surprised when Harry unexpectedly asked her to take a walk outside. Hermione walked along with Harry enjoying the feel of fresh snow beneath her feet. She simply loved the winter holiday and it raised her spirits even more. Harry stopped at a huge oak tree and held her hand as he looked up into the stars. Hermione was acutely aware of Harry's hand in hers and looked up at the clear night sky. She loved the stars and tonight they seemed to be sparkling especially for her. She noticed that Harry wasn't looking at the stars any longer but at her and she could sense his intense stare.  
  
Hermione looked at Harry and gave him a perplexed look. She was starting to feel awkward and confused. Harry gently wiped a loose strand of hair away from her face. "Hermione, I love you. I have been so afraid to tell you but I can't hold it in any longer. I am so truly, madly, deeply in love with you." Harry leaned in and pressed his lips to her giving her a kiss filled with all the passion of his deep feelings for her.  
  
He leaned back and looked into her eyes searching for something. Hermione just stood there in complete shock. If she was confused before she was even more now. She stood there not knowing what to do or say then all of a sudden she heard footsteps behind her. She swung around to meet the rage filled face of Ron. Ron stood there huffing loudly as he threw his intense gaze to Harry.  
  
"HOW DARE YOU!!! I confessed my feelings to you about how much I love Hermione and I catch you kissing her. YOU BASTARD!!! I thought you were my friend. I thought I could trust you." Ron lunged forward slamming his fist into Harry's face. Harry met that with a blow to Ron's stomach.  
  
Hermione stood there in absolute shock. This wasn't the way this was supposed to turn out. She never wanted this to happen that's why she kept it to herself. Now the best thing and worst has happened. She finally knows that the man she has loved for so long returns those feelings but she also realizes that the three's friendship will forever be torn apart. She couldn't help feeling as if this was all her fault. Hermione just stood there watching them fight each other. Her world was closing in on her and she started to feel as if someone had their slimy grip around her throat. She couldn't breathe and everything started getting dizzy. All at once, Hermione fell to the ground with a thump and her world went totally black. 


	3. Back to the beginning

Hermione's eyes started to flutter slightly as she came to. She noticed that she wasn't outside any longer but in a nice warm bed. She tried to focus on the things around her but her head hurt so badly. It felt like someone was driving a knife through her skull. She could hear whispering around her and turned to see Madam Pomfrey talking to what looked like Harry and Ron.  
  
"Boys, you can not stay in here, you are in serious trouble and the last thing Hermione needs at this moment is to see you two all bruised and bloody. Now you can both come back in the morning during visiting hours." Madam Pomfrey said as she started shooing them away.  
  
Hermione closed her eyes again quickly so they wouldn't see her awake. She just didn't feel like dealing with this right now. She felt her tummy rumble and remembered that she hadn't eaten all day, but the thought of actually eating something made her stomach churn. She heard the door to the hospital wing close and Pomfrey rummaging through something on the other side of the room. She slowly opened her eyes, because any sudden movements made her head feel like it was splitting down the center. Madam Pomfrey saw her and hurried to her side.  
  
"Hermione, dear, how are you feeling?"  
  
Hermione tried to clear her throat as she brought her hand to her head. "My head is throbbing terribly."  
  
"Don't you worry; I have just the thing to make you feel better." Madam Pomfrey swiftly appeared with some type of potion. Hermione didn't even ask what was in it or if she had to hold her nose to skirt around tasting it. She gulped it down and grimaced at its bitter, nasty taste. She tried with all her might not to gag.  
  
"Now you go to bed, you've had a very long day." With that Madam Pomfrey left the wing and it become dark as night; all Hermione could see was the shadow of the moon shining through the window across the room. As she laid there looking up at the full moon, Hermione slowly started to drift into a deep sleep.  
  
Hermione was running now.she was running as fast as her feet could carry her. She couldn't let them catch her. She looked over her shoulder to see how close they really were. Hermione knew that was a mistake because she saw that Harry and Ron were right on her tail. They kept calling her name and trying to grab her, she couldn't hear what they were saying but she knew she couldn't handle it. There has to be an open room around here. Hermione stumbled and almost tripped over her own feet. Ron grabbed the back of her shirt trying to get her to stop. "NOOOOOOOOOO.I can't, leave me alone!" Hermione started scream as she broke free. Suddenly as if it was a miracle from Heaven a door appeared before her and she ran inside and locked the door. They kept banging on the door telling her to let them in. Didn't they understand that she couldn't let them in It was impossible. Hermione had never felt so scared in her life. She sat in the middle of the room rocking back and forth, back and forth. She closed her eyes trying to make it all go away. But when she opened them again, she saw that the walls were slowly closing her in. She couldn't get away. They started choking her and squeezing her. She tried to call for help but no sound came out of her mouth...  
  
Hermione jumped out of the bed she was laying on and threw the sheets off the bed. "NOOOOO." she screamed, she couldn't breath. Someone was shaking her. Was she still in the dream? How was the possible? Hermione tried to force those villainous hands off of her.  
  
"HERMIONE!!!" Ron screamed as he tried to calm her down. "Its me Ron, don't you know me. Why do you keep trying to fight me off?"  
  
Hermione looked at Ron realizing that she wasn't in her dream any longer and there was no need to fight. She took in a deep breath and made her eyes focus. Hermione shook her head as if it could help clear her shattered mind. "Ron what are you doing here? I thought Madam Pomfrey said you weren't aloud to be in here."  
  
"Hermione, I needed to talk to you. I needed to know how you felt. I don't want to push you but I have loved you for so long and if you don't return that I need to know so that I can start to mend my broken heart." Ron took Hermione's hands into his and gently kissed each of her finger tips. He looked deep into her eyes trying to search for some type of answer. "Please, Hermione, you can tell me no matter what your answer is, I will always be here for you."  
  
Hermione looked back at Ron and sighed. "Ron, the truth is, I have loved you for a long time. But don't you see this can't work. It just can't."  
  
Ron suddenly felt lighter then air hearing that she loved him too but just as soon as he was on cloud nine his world quickly dropped. "What do you mean it can't work, of course it can. I love you and you love me, what more is there?"  
  
"Ron I have destroyed everything. You and Harry are fighting with each other and it's my absolute fault. I love you so much. My heart is breaking as I try to conjure up the courage to say all this to you. I can't tear you and Harry apart. I would feel so guilty and I have caused more problems then I could ever imagine." Hermione leaned in and kissed Ron for the first time. She put all her pent up emotion and love for him in that one kiss hoping that it would last her a lifetime. "Now go. Don't come back. And Ron forget about me"  
  
With that Hermione turned on her side, ignoring Ron. She laid there as silent tears streamed down her face. She felt him move off the bed and out the door. She didn't know what was going to happen now but whatever it was she knew it wouldn't end happily. Hermione didn't sleep the rest of the night but instead cried all her pain into the stiff white pillow on the hospital bed, hoping to find some sort of comfort in it. But tears no longer had their special healing powers they once did. Hermione was broken. 


End file.
